snack bitch

I’ve been called a lot of things
Snack Bitch is a name I give myself
Referring to my kids' requests
About snacks from the pantry’s shelf

Snack Bitch is what I picture
My kids call me in their head
As the King and Queen clamour
It ain’t Mom, it’s Snack Bitch instead

When the children are at home
Which is more often than not
They get bored, want to know what
Snacks from the grocery store mom bought

“Snack Bitch, what did you buy today?”
“Snack Bitch, please give me some of that!”
“Open this package, Snack Bitch!”
"Get on it, Snack Bitch and STAT!"

I use my teeth as Snack Bitches do
To open gummy bear fruit treats
Empty wrappers later found
On the floor under their seats

Out of the house, at events
Kids look to mom once we arrive
“What did you bring for us to eat?”
As if they need snacks to survive

On road trips, Snack Bitch is ON
Kids assume mom’s a dispenser
Treats are passed to the backseat
And if not quickly, there are tempers

When snack demands come in hot
A few minutes before dinner
Language brewing in mom's mind
Would surely make her out a sinner

Sometimes though mama will cave
Before the fam sits down to eat
But soon regrets her giving in
“I’m not hungry, I had a treat!”